State+of+Loneliness

In Chapter 1 (Childhood, Youth and the Changing Media Environment) of Young People and New Media, Sonia Livingstone states nine fundamental paradoxes in our societies point of reference to children and young people. Each of theses paradoxes “tell us something about the locus of concern over young people and each warns us of the trap into which we as adults are liable to fall.” (Livingstone,2002,7). A few of the paradoxes stood out to me because they made me remember how much of my childhood was spent isolated from my family and into a state of loneliness. Most of my childhood was spent by myself and a room that had mainly every type of media, from my telephone, T.V, radio, to even C.D players. These mediums helped me navigate through life, and entertain myself was I was alone. One paradox stated that “adults want and like children but are producing fewer and fewer of them, while society is providing less time and space for them.” (Livingstone,2002,7). This made me think of growing up and only having two sisters who were both older than me, and didn’t really want me to hang with them. Since they were around the same age I was left alone in the house with nothing to do but get on the phone and watch T.V. I remember sitting in my room eating “Cookies and Cream” ice cream and watching my favorite T.V shows on my 19 inch T.V. I would literally keep watching T.V shows after T.V shows until I found something else to do. I watched hours of movies from “The First Wives Club,” “The Flintstones,” to “Goosebumps.” I remember hitting the rewind button on my big VCR box over and over again to watch parts that made me laugh and to image that I my life was a fairy tale just like the characters. I always wanted that sense of a real family and family time but watching these movies was the closest I’ve ever gotten to actually having family time and not feeling lonely. This sense of lonely also made me reflect on why so much of my time was spent in front of the T.V and relying media. This leads me to another paradox that states, “ Adults believe it is good for children and parents to be together, but more and more they live their everyday lives apart from each other.” (Livingstone,2002,7). Growing up, my mother was constantly at work so it was hard to build a real mother daughter relationship. The balancing of her work and her kids was really hard to do. Work was her life and school was mine, so when I got home from school and she still wasn’t around, the closest I got to expressing my feelings to someone or have fun was to get on the phone with a friend. I would talk for hours about school, to boys, to episodes of my favorite T.V shows. Growing up, having a mother but not having her around sometimes felt like I didn’t have a mother because that sense of loneliness was with me everyday. The way I learned about what was going on in the world was from reading the daily newspaper called the “Daily News” that was sent to my house everyday. I would first start with the headlines, once I learned what was going on in my neighborhood and environment I then moved on to the games section and did all the crossword puzzles, and Crypto grapples. Back then, even though I thought that the crossword puzzles and crypto grapples were just a way to kill time, they actually enhanced my vocabulary and ended up working as an advantage for me in the long run. These Paradoxes made me reflect on how much of my day was consumed by media. I never really realized how much I depended on media to get through life. Don’t get me wrong my mother was a good mother when she was around, I just believe that if she was around more often then I wouldn’t have had to depend on media as much.

Edited By: Brian Berrodin

Livingstone, Sonia. (2002). Young People and new media. London: Sage Publications Ltd.